Monday, April 28, 2008


so seeing as how some of you think my blog is whack, i have decided to pay tribute to my close friends. as some of you may or may not know the past little while for mr lokestroke have been a little "challenging." i am glad to say that i have been pulled out of my rut(s) and have seen the light. there is no way that i could have been able to change my ways, or take on the bull by its horns without you. so, i thank you. for the next lil while i will give praise to those who have hooked a brother up! in no particular order- here's to you:
today's lucky winner:

the infamous Jacob Porter Melzer- oh how far we have come since those days of May Hall circa 2000-2001. from a lowly caterpillar you have blossomed into a butterfly- literally- THE social butterfly of all social butterflies. some things that the blogging world may not know about JPM-

he probably holds the record for most parking tickets at BYU. i am pretty sure that is the reason why his graduation was delayed.

he is easily the best driver in grid-lock utarded traffic. (no offense to my cousins and aunts in UT--you guys can't drive). but not always the best with talking his way out of a ticket- even when he flashes the "my dad was in the FBI" card.

he once hooked up with three girls in the same apartment. not at once- that's gross. but over a couple weeks, it all "just happened."

he is the soul reason for the Anti-Cheney commencement speaker protest at BYU- not because he's anti- but because he is a freakin clown. he started it as a joke and his disciples followed suit. way to ruffle some feathers melzer.

with his help he and i are the reason why Costa Azul, now known as Costa Vida, stayed in business. we ate there nearly everyday for a solid month and promoted the crap out of it. we never saw any royalty checks.

he is an incredible bowler, but chokes under pressure. many a night in Eagle Bowl were spent losing pride and cash-but all in good fun.

he is the founder of the "wall of amazing" a feat and jewel to mankind in itself.

he once had a pet rat that he named Merlin after his mission president.

he is the only guy i know who will not give up the pure pleasure of wearin Haviana sandals even in the chilling, snowy winters of Utah. your dedication to the haviana is one of a kind.

mr. melzer is not afraid to splash a little color on his toenails. he likes to stick to a theme or season personal fave was the easter egg purple.

above all, Jake is a solid friend that will always make you laugh and come through for you in the end. beyond his social popularity, Melzer has one of the biggest hearts i know. for those of your that truly know him, i hope you consider yourself as lucky as i do to call him my friend.

my blog is whack

so a good friend of mine just told me that my blog was "whack." what's that all about? you know what dear friend of mine- YOU are whack! so to all those who think my blog is whack, lets see how whack it can truly be, shall we? one thing that he pointed out to me was the fact that me and the infamous George Michael Bluth worked in the luxurious industry of frozen bananas. i suppose that was the best summer of my life. i think the 2,500 clams that i got (all in 1's) at the end of the six weeks was the highlight. nothing like walking through a sea of carnies with a huge stash of cash in a cotton candy carton. good times.

you know what else is whack? this guy: David W Walls from Williamsburg, PA , had a brilliant idea on sunday afternoon. what else is there to do on a sunday beside get totally drunk and hang out in your backyard? well, apparently shoot bees. yes, shoot bees. so genius that he is, David load his .22 with buckshot to ward off the pesky pests. in the process, he shot himself in the hand and had to be rushed to the hospital by his son. David W Walls, I salute you!